January 16, 2004 - 7:33 am
I've been so introspective lately...not sure why. Either I'm just now figuring out that I have issues, or those issues are just beginning to surface. Nothing serious, I guess, but it just came into my head the other night.
See, my Dad and I were so, so close when I was young. My mon and dad divorced when I was 2, and I never really knew life any other way. But, when he came to get me on the weekends, I'd stand and cry - I mean sob - at the window when he left. I'd cry for an hour or so, or until my mom told me I was being rediculous.
All of my life, I've had issues with being "left". While I never really said it out loud, I was always afraid my boyfriend/husband/etc. would leave me. Whatever.
Now, I'm a mother. I've not left my child - EVER - in 15 months, and I think the reason is twofold. First, I'm terrified that it'll open a Pandora's box with Momzilla (my MIL who lives 2 doors down, for those uninitiated). If I leave him with her once, she'll feel free to request to have him whenever her little heart desires. I'd rather slit my wrists with a plastic butter knife than leave him with her. Also, for some reason, I'm just. plain. afraid. to leave him. Not that I think anything terrible will happen, or that he'll miss me terribly (he's SO social!)...but that I'll miss something great with him, or...well, honestly I don't know just what. I just dread it.
Apparently the Hub feels that way too. The other day when I was sick, I felt it'd be in LittleH's best interest to leave him home while I went to the clinic to see the doctor. The Hub looked panicked when I told him I'd be back. He said he thought it'd be best to put him in the car & we could all drive to the clinic, and he and LittleH would go eat, or go to the store or something.
Interesting. I guess we all have issues, eh?
If you haven't ever seen The Storypeople prints...so yourself a favor and go check out the website. I love them!
~Lisa
